Thursday, August 16, 2007
Blog-o-sphere
I've recently been intrigued by this whole realm of blogging that has become a cultural phenom in itself. I, of course, I am a little behind the times on it all and a little out of time but think that it might be a good outlet for me to hone in on my abilities...and desire to blog on a more regular basis and to read blogs as well. I find it an outlet I quite enjoy and want to put some work into.
Capacity issues...
I have capacity issues. I have no capacity and I finally think that I am okay with that. I no longer want to try harder or push through it. I have no capacity. I am leaving it up to a power greater than me and I'm hoping that power comes through because I am at the end of me.
So, I spend any alone time I have reading blogs, watching TV and playing games on www.pogo.com. Ok, I do a few other things like chores around the house and some homework but really I just feel like vegetating. The rub is that I am a type-A, doer personality with a host of issues that keep me going, going and going and taking on way too much. I feel guilty taking time to myself. I feel guilty for all the things I'm not doing and the crazy thought that all those things might just eliminate the stress in my life. I feel guilty for not being prepared in all ways for the next phase of my life or more so being okay with the fact that I've changed my mind on what I can do and be at this time in my life. Basically, I'm crazy... but then again, I am a therapist and we know all therapists are crazy.
So, I am coming to accept this part of myself. I am coming to terms with this part of myself. I'm just going to try and be where I am at and be honest with my limitations, my regrets and my feelings.
So, I spend any alone time I have reading blogs, watching TV and playing games on www.pogo.com. Ok, I do a few other things like chores around the house and some homework but really I just feel like vegetating. The rub is that I am a type-A, doer personality with a host of issues that keep me going, going and going and taking on way too much. I feel guilty taking time to myself. I feel guilty for all the things I'm not doing and the crazy thought that all those things might just eliminate the stress in my life. I feel guilty for not being prepared in all ways for the next phase of my life or more so being okay with the fact that I've changed my mind on what I can do and be at this time in my life. Basically, I'm crazy... but then again, I am a therapist and we know all therapists are crazy.
So, I am coming to accept this part of myself. I am coming to terms with this part of myself. I'm just going to try and be where I am at and be honest with my limitations, my regrets and my feelings.
Sunday, August 12, 2007
Just enough time...
...for a post on my blog!
It's Sunday morning and again I've skipped out on church and breakfast with James and my future mother-in-law to sleep in. Those two hours of sleeping in and the opportunity to either clean or read the paper while drinking a home brewed cup of coffee are a gift to my sanity at this stage in life. Of course, even now as a multi-task....blog, coffee, paper...I am listening a lecture for my online class. It never ends. Ok, it feels like it'll never end.
YES, I found the Michael's ad in the newspaper and again they are providing TWO 40% off coupons. One for this week...and one for next week. Virtually all wedding supplies for our wedding have been bough via a 40% coupon. I think I've been to Michael's almost every week for the past 8 months. It's like a game now.
Newsflash... Target has a lot of items on sale in the housewares and some of the things on our registry. I'm just saying it might be time to buy a gift for ME for a good deal! :)
Anyway, an update on me. Life has been NUTS! The last few weeks specifically have been challenging to my sanity and I'll admit I've lost it a few times. So, things are a brewing for changes to my otherwise insane and impossible schedule...and some priorities...much like the events of this morning...to bring some balance to all of life. Doing something physical every day will be right up there so as things get FRUSTRATING, I can take them out in a healthy and productive way....and say, not on James. That might be good. Today he told me it was about time to call the Bridezilla crew.
The crazy part of it all is that none of it is bad in of itself. It's just that too much good is still too much and then the juggling of that makes the bad come out.
The end of the summer quarter is here. I have two more weeks of my online class. That's the lecture I am listening to right now. Then I have an IDL which is a series of lectures, reading and assignment you do at your own pace. I have until December 8th but promised myself that I wasn't going to do that to myself so I am busily learning all there is to know about Islam which has been fascinating. The EXCITING part about finishing these two classes is that beyond a Biblical Hermeneutics and Counseling class I have in the Spring 2008, that is IT for my MA in Theology and that is IT for classes I find academically challenging. It is that very fact that keeps me on task as hard as it is. I feel like I have senioritis all over again this quarter.
Practicum has been going well. Knock on wood. I have six clients. I've been meeting with four of them very consistently and then I just started with two others this past Saturday. I've been very lucky to have a great start to my practicum and have the amount of clients who have come in quickly and stuck. Anyway, I feel comfortable in the room and challenged all at the same time. My supervisor is excellent. I've really benefited from her perspective and her helpful techniques which has really opened my eyes.
I'm also going to start the community-based aspect of my program. I'll more than likely be a therapist at Jefferson Elementary School here in Pasadena. I have training at the end of the month. I'll receive 3 referrals then. I'll be either meeting them at the school, in their homes or at one of our agencies. I'll be working with kids but approaching more from what is going on in the family and in the school...working with the teachers and administration. I'm really excited about this aspect of my program as it seems the community mental health is moving more towards therapist out in the field for the purpose of gathering real data on the family system and other systems the child exists in as opposed to the clients coming to the the mental health agency. It is more multi-disciplinary and systems oriented. I like this because I am a sociologist and our training as MFT has been largely family systems based.
Wedding plans are going well. It's been relatively quiet over the summer months other than the rants and raves from me on how to pay for it all. The early planning, etc. has been a good thing but still many little details to figure out that I need to start getting on top of. I am anxious for the day. I think now that we are getting closer to the fall that it seems more of a reality and that gets me excited...and STRESSED! It mostly gets me excited.
James is doing well. He started a new job at the Home Depot. It's been a tough training schedule and overall the job isn't ideal but it pays money and in 90 days benefits. I think that is what I am most excited about. He works primarily days and then a weekend day... usually Saturday which sucks... but I see clients on Saturday too which then just works out for us. The great part is that he works in Covina and eventually will move to Pasadena which is OPPOSITE traffic which is terrific. He started at one of the highest pays in his department which is a good thing too.
Geesh, this turned out to be a long post. I feel like I had something else to blog about but I forget and that's probably okay since this one if forever long anyway.
It's Sunday morning and again I've skipped out on church and breakfast with James and my future mother-in-law to sleep in. Those two hours of sleeping in and the opportunity to either clean or read the paper while drinking a home brewed cup of coffee are a gift to my sanity at this stage in life. Of course, even now as a multi-task....blog, coffee, paper...I am listening a lecture for my online class. It never ends. Ok, it feels like it'll never end.
YES, I found the Michael's ad in the newspaper and again they are providing TWO 40% off coupons. One for this week...and one for next week. Virtually all wedding supplies for our wedding have been bough via a 40% coupon. I think I've been to Michael's almost every week for the past 8 months. It's like a game now.
Newsflash... Target has a lot of items on sale in the housewares and some of the things on our registry. I'm just saying it might be time to buy a gift for ME for a good deal! :)
Anyway, an update on me. Life has been NUTS! The last few weeks specifically have been challenging to my sanity and I'll admit I've lost it a few times. So, things are a brewing for changes to my otherwise insane and impossible schedule...and some priorities...much like the events of this morning...to bring some balance to all of life. Doing something physical every day will be right up there so as things get FRUSTRATING, I can take them out in a healthy and productive way....and say, not on James. That might be good. Today he told me it was about time to call the Bridezilla crew.
The crazy part of it all is that none of it is bad in of itself. It's just that too much good is still too much and then the juggling of that makes the bad come out.
The end of the summer quarter is here. I have two more weeks of my online class. That's the lecture I am listening to right now. Then I have an IDL which is a series of lectures, reading and assignment you do at your own pace. I have until December 8th but promised myself that I wasn't going to do that to myself so I am busily learning all there is to know about Islam which has been fascinating. The EXCITING part about finishing these two classes is that beyond a Biblical Hermeneutics and Counseling class I have in the Spring 2008, that is IT for my MA in Theology and that is IT for classes I find academically challenging. It is that very fact that keeps me on task as hard as it is. I feel like I have senioritis all over again this quarter.
Practicum has been going well. Knock on wood. I have six clients. I've been meeting with four of them very consistently and then I just started with two others this past Saturday. I've been very lucky to have a great start to my practicum and have the amount of clients who have come in quickly and stuck. Anyway, I feel comfortable in the room and challenged all at the same time. My supervisor is excellent. I've really benefited from her perspective and her helpful techniques which has really opened my eyes.
I'm also going to start the community-based aspect of my program. I'll more than likely be a therapist at Jefferson Elementary School here in Pasadena. I have training at the end of the month. I'll receive 3 referrals then. I'll be either meeting them at the school, in their homes or at one of our agencies. I'll be working with kids but approaching more from what is going on in the family and in the school...working with the teachers and administration. I'm really excited about this aspect of my program as it seems the community mental health is moving more towards therapist out in the field for the purpose of gathering real data on the family system and other systems the child exists in as opposed to the clients coming to the the mental health agency. It is more multi-disciplinary and systems oriented. I like this because I am a sociologist and our training as MFT has been largely family systems based.
Wedding plans are going well. It's been relatively quiet over the summer months other than the rants and raves from me on how to pay for it all. The early planning, etc. has been a good thing but still many little details to figure out that I need to start getting on top of. I am anxious for the day. I think now that we are getting closer to the fall that it seems more of a reality and that gets me excited...and STRESSED! It mostly gets me excited.
James is doing well. He started a new job at the Home Depot. It's been a tough training schedule and overall the job isn't ideal but it pays money and in 90 days benefits. I think that is what I am most excited about. He works primarily days and then a weekend day... usually Saturday which sucks... but I see clients on Saturday too which then just works out for us. The great part is that he works in Covina and eventually will move to Pasadena which is OPPOSITE traffic which is terrific. He started at one of the highest pays in his department which is a good thing too.
Geesh, this turned out to be a long post. I feel like I had something else to blog about but I forget and that's probably okay since this one if forever long anyway.
Tuesday, August 7, 2007
Not a good sign...
It's 8:10am and I'm walking to work. I check my work email on my Treo which only gives me frustrating news. It's already a bad day. That is no good at 8:10am.
Things to do:
1. Get rid of stupid Treo that checks email. I'd like to delay any bad news to as late in the day as possible.
2. Be thankful that I am getting my graduate degree in marriage and family therapy and will soon will deal with drama I care about.
3. Drink coffee and make sure to play a couple rounds of No Limit Texas Hold Em or other brain draining game to spite work for its frustration in my otherwise peaceful life.
:)
Things to do:
1. Get rid of stupid Treo that checks email. I'd like to delay any bad news to as late in the day as possible.
2. Be thankful that I am getting my graduate degree in marriage and family therapy and will soon will deal with drama I care about.
3. Drink coffee and make sure to play a couple rounds of No Limit Texas Hold Em or other brain draining game to spite work for its frustration in my otherwise peaceful life.
:)
Saturday, July 14, 2007
It's official...I'm a therapist...and I think I'm going to like it...phew!
Well, I've officially begun my career as a therapist. I saw two clients today and things went well. The hard part is over...well, probably not the hardest part...but I'm past the "seen the first client" stage. I had one client not show up and I've called to follow-up with them. I have another client this coming Thursday. Anyway, it's going well and we'll see how it continues to go from here. Whoot! Whoot!
Tuesday, July 10, 2007
Monday, July 9, 2007
pretty amazing...
He did my laundry tonight cause I needed help and he's here to help me. I love him.
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